you need to know something about me before you go on thinking i'm a depressed girl who is on the verge of killing herself. unfortunately when i'm down, the world falls over my life and i feel like i'm drowning. i see everything in the dark and refuse t hear anything good because it feel like the biggest loser ever. ofcourse a few days will go by and i'll think about it and laugh. i guess that's the only thing i kept from my other side. the one who really wanted to kill herself years ago.
i'm really not that pessimistic, but i am human and need to let me steam off some way. and what i wrote earlier isn't entirely true. there are people at work who i trust and who help me more than i may see. i just feel like i need some reassurance. but i know i need to be strong and face the facts. no one said this way easy. i have to learn how to deal with the pressure.
2:48 p.m. - 2002-12-29
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